Tuesday, January 26, 2010

mindless chatter

look out and see
the bright in me
my pretty stripes and dirty knees
my tossled hair
big underwear
my wit my charm
dont be alarmed
if i break down
i still will smile
and want you to stay and talk a while
i ramble on
(as you can tell)
i think your funny and oh so swell
and ive got spots
and cheeky bits
a smudge of paint
and quite nice....
you get the good
the bad the wierd
all of me
i wont be shared

my petals soft
my color peach
i am not beyond you reach
but work a bit
and i will too
now nuff was said
.. how do YOU do?


Sunday, January 24, 2010

birthday


so this past week was my birthday!!
yes i am 31
no longer young
but not really old yet either
although this past year has me feeling older then ever!
hehe
some young friend making me feel like my times running out
before my very eyes
and some my own age making jokes about "cougar"
which i find completely disturbing! haha
either i am what i am
take me or leave me

i think ive gained a few more wrinkles this year
and maybe a couple pounds
but ive gained love this year
and adventures and knowledge

ive realized things i really like this year
and things i want
not material things
i watched my kids grow older
and been hugged by people i love dearly
i got to spend lazy sundays with
with the man i love

yay 31!






Friday, January 22, 2010

5painful truths

top 5 worst bits :

1. i promise no matter what ... apparently meant i promise until i get what i want and im done

2. i wanted to build you up so that you have that much farther to fall when i drop you.

3. i wanted to show you how precious you are to me. then tell you i wouldnt take you if you were the last person on earth

4. i had you repeat your all mine. and then left you there with no one to turn to

5. i wanted you to be completely honest and exposed to me. so i in turn could lie and then watch your pain



Sunday, January 17, 2010

me photography


you may or may not know that i am on flickr
my photography is there
mixed in with goods from my shops
and random bits of whatever i please

this year i am going to try and
grow
i bit more in my skills
play around with that i can do

You may have noticed my flickr
shrunk?
a bit
haha well i have decided to go underground
so to speak
hide myself
while i do love being the center of
one persons attention
i dont like so much
to be everyones.
too many eyes on me and i shrink back
into the shadows
in hopes that they move on

so there you have it
just my photography and less me
win win i say

and i hope you all enjoy :)

Saturday, January 9, 2010

valentines at moosh


theres love at MOOSHOO
and its ready for the taking
from hearts on a string
to the little girls dressing up in their cutest
sweetheart dresses

and not just love
but a little ...
FOREPLAY?
these naughty fun dice are just perfect!






Tuesday, January 5, 2010

earthquake

i stared at the words
the words
i hated them
its like somehow they reached into my chest
and pulled out my heart
i lost my breath



i didnt know what to say
seems nothing
and even if i did it wouldnt have mattered
thats the part that just killed


fast forward:
________________
grrrrrrr!
im mad the adrenaline is pumping
i want to scream
i want to rage
where did this come from?
and so quickly brought on

i cant believe how much you can hurt me

i need a release
i want to run out into the cold air
i want to scream out into the blackness
i want to ...

fast forward:
_____________________
slow deep breaths
mentally tell myself its ok
try and get a grip on things
(silly cause as soon as i get one your there again prying my fingers off)
close my eyes
more deep breaths
ok
...

the adrenaline has slowed a bit
i find myself wanting
i find myself wishing to run to place where i dont have to think about it
only the place i want to run
is gone
so now im just wanting
.....

fast forward:
_______________________
eyes swollen from tears
head a little achy

i want to sleep
for days
till the feeling goes
but then again
days might not be long enough




Sunday, January 3, 2010

2010




HAPPY NEW YEAR
2010

for everyone of us
there is something good
and something not so appealing
we are all in this together
so remember to love
as much as you can
and give all of yourself
hug everyone you meet
tell people you love just how much
and forgive