mindless chatter

look out and see

the bright in me

my pretty stripes and dirty knees

my tossled hair

big underwear

my wit my charm

dont be alarmed

if i break down

i still will smile

and want you to stay and talk a while

i ramble on

(as you can tell)

i think your funny and oh so swell

and ive got spots

and cheeky bits

a smudge of paint

and quite nice....

you get the good

the bad the wierd

all of me

i wont be shared

my petals soft

my color peach

i am not beyond you reach

but work a bit

and i will too

now nuff was said

.. how do YOU do?

birthday

so this past week was my birthday!!

yes i am 31

no longer young

but not really old yet either

although this past year has me feeling older then ever!

hehe

some young friend making me feel like my times running out

before my very eyes

and some my own age making jokes about "cougar"

which i find completely disturbing! haha

either i am what i am

take me or leave me

i think ive gained a few more wrinkles this year

and maybe a couple pounds

but ive gained love this year

and adventures and knowledge

ive realized things i really like this year

and things i want

not material things

i watched my kids grow older

and been hugged by people i love dearly

i got to spend lazy sundays with

with the man i love

yay 31!

5painful truths

top 5 worst bits :

1. i promise no matter what ... apparently meant i promise until i get what i want and im done

2. i wanted to build you up so that you have that much farther to fall when i drop you.

3. i wanted to show you how precious you are to me. then tell you i wouldnt take you if you were the last person on earth

4. i had you repeat your all mine. and then left you there with no one to turn to

5. i wanted you to be completely honest and exposed to me. so i in turn could lie and then watch your pain

me photography

you may or may not know that i am on flickr

my photography is there

mixed in with goods from my shops

and random bits of whatever i please

this year i am going to try and

grow

i bit more in my skills

play around with that i can do

You may have noticed my flickr

shrunk?

a bit

haha well i have decided to go underground

so to speak

hide myself

while i do love being the center of

one persons attention

i dont like so much

to be everyones.

too many eyes on me and i shrink back

into the shadows

in hopes that they move on

so there you have it

just my photography and less me

win win i say

and i hope you all enjoy :)

valentines at moosh

theres love at MOOSHOO

and its ready for the taking

from hearts on a string

to the little girls dressing up in their cutest

sweetheart dresses

and not just love

but a little ...

FOREPLAY?

these naughty fun dice are just perfect!

earthquake

i stared at the words

the words

i hated them

its like somehow they reached into my chest

and pulled out my heart

i lost my breath

i didnt know what to say

seems nothing

and even if i did it wouldnt have mattered

thats the part that just killed

fast forward:

________________

grrrrrrr!

im mad the adrenaline is pumping

i want to scream

i want to rage

where did this come from?

and so quickly brought on

i cant believe how much you can hurt me

i need a release

i want to run out into the cold air

i want to scream out into the blackness

i want to ...

fast forward:

_____________________

slow deep breaths

mentally tell myself its ok

try and get a grip on things

(silly cause as soon as i get one your there again prying my fingers off)

close my eyes

more deep breaths

ok

...

the adrenaline has slowed a bit

i find myself wanting

i find myself wishing to run to place where i dont have to think about it

only the place i want to run

is gone

so now im just wanting

.....

fast forward:

_______________________

eyes swollen from tears

head a little achy

i want to sleep

for days

till the feeling goes

but then again

days might not be long enough

2010

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2010

for everyone of us

there is something good

and something not so appealing

we are all in this together

so remember to love

as much as you can

and give all of yourself

hug everyone you meet

tell people you love just how much

and forgive